a small breath of magic

When was the last time you woke up before the sun? When was the last time you saw the gum drop fiery caramel colors leaking in molasses fashion from the horizon? When was the last time you saw a symphony of hues so attune to one’s inner beauty? When was the last time you witnessed the sun’s first eyelash rays blink over the east? Perhaps you do it everyday, perhaps it’s routine, perhaps you’re so over it… but for me it’s a special rarity, like winning a seven scoop ice cream cone at costume karaoke.

You may say that I’m unlucky this time of year living in the Southern Hemisphere. Today is shorter that yesterday and, with every rotation of our planet, the starry night sneaks patiently forward invading our daylight hours. Yes, you may say I’m unlucky, but I say that I have a favorable advantage to wake up relatively late and still be graced with the universe’s celestial painting canvas.

So what am I doing awake before 9am? Aren’t I on vacation? What am I doing wearing work appropriate clothes and dry erase marker stains on my fingers? And what am I still doing in Zapala?!!

Yes, I came out of early retirement. I went back to the white board. I swam in the textbook waters and took the idiom express to the land of impromptu grammar games. But don’t worry, it was so temporary that it’s already over! I was offered four days of playing substitute teacher at an English institute. Yes, the dreaded substitute teacher position.

But subbing is where I shine. I don’t have to deal with deadlines, homework grading, lesson planning, and test writing. I just go with my enthusiasm, my energy, my stories, and my smile. As a substitute teacher, I’ve decided that my job is to inspire, not to be an overbearing vocabulary drill sergeant. And that’s what I love.

So I spent this week, bouncing around the classroom. Sometimes simultaneously raising my voice and arms in excitement, frantically scribbling/doodling on the board, jumping up onto chairs, and giving the smack-down of common sense. I had a good time. A very good time.

But I’m happy to be unemployed again.

Especially this week. This week I presented myself with two challenges. One. Learn to play the guitar. Two. Learn juggling. What a week to also have a full class schedule! I don’t pretend to want to learn everything or even just the basics about guitar or juggling. But rather the purpose of those goals is to push me to take the first step. Pick up a guitar! Pluck a string. Throw some objects in the air. Raid youtube’s wealth of instructional videos. Find local experts. Tread new waters. Add to my experience bank account. Have some fun.

It’s invigorating to challenge yourself to try something new.

But speaking of having fun, I’ll be honest with you all, I’m starting to worry about myself. I've been noticing some bizarre changes. For the past few days I have found myself spontaneously grinning. Out of nowhere, I have an uncontrollable smile erupting from my lips. Usually I'm alone. And doing nothing out of the ordinary. And suddenly I realize that I'm smiling. Chuckling even.

I don’t understand it at all. It kind of confuses me. But it feels good. It feels right. And... maybe I don't have to understand it.

Whatever it is, this inexplicable happiness, I like it. I want to nurture it. I want to harvest some new and fragrant experiences from its strong elegant vines.

I want to follow… no, create!… my life’s path. Let's go!